ISOLATION

.........IS THERE..............................








...........................ANYBODY...........................................










........................................OUT THERE?...............................

Broken

Aftermath

I FEEL:


Grief over losing (what?) something that was not true to begin with...


Anger over feeling mislead (lied to).....


Shame over believing everything I was fed...........


Pathetic for wanting love so desperately I am so easily fooled.......


Despair over being emotionally devastated.  AGAIN.......


Frustrated over not being able to find the lesson (although I do recognize the gifts this time)......


Doubtful about my ability to prevent this from happening to me again....


Fearful of never finding what I am looking for........................


Hopeful that these feelings will fade very soon..........

Bare

"A Thousand Beautiful Things" by Annie Lennox

(click on the link)

A most wonderful song from an incredible album entitled "Bare", telling the story of all the phases a woman goes through in ending a relationship.   This song is the first on the album and actually the last of the stages of a break-up, recovery and gratitude at feeling alive again.  I had the great privilege of watching her perform this song on some morning show years ago when I was on maternity leave with my son.  I've always really admired her, and her performance and the interview afterwards floored me.  She said the album was titled "Bare" because these songs were all intensely personal.  And it has SO helped me so many times!


Other songs include "Honestly", "Bitter Pill' and "Erased" (one of my very favorites).  Hearing someone else describe what you are feeling and hearing how they express it has been very empowering for me, helping me remember who I am and what an awesome, giving, nurturing person I am.  And I deserve to be cherished as I cherish the significant other in my life (when I have one).


If dudes in my life only knew, once I pull out this cd, you are history, pal.  Been listening to this a lot lately.  :)

GRATITUDE

I cannot say enough about it.  (And, I am writing in red because it's my very most favorite color and I am grateful for it!)


At the advice of a very good friend, I have started keeping a gratitude journal.  I have been amazed at the vast quantities of things that make me happy.....so much so that once I start making my gratitude list every evening, I can't stop writing things down!


I have found that I am even grateful for the sad, painful unpleasant things because they lead to personal growth and "bigger and bettter".  This was a BIG epiphany for me.   Finally, a way to actually process the yuck and let it go, something I've never been able to really do before.  And the cleansing process of crying it all out is miraculous in itself.


Imagine, being grateful for anger and bitterness.  I should have already known that because one of my Notes from the Universe said just that:  be grateful for anger and bitterness for they are signs that you are not on the right path.


Already this morning I am grateful for waking up next to my son (little love), the early morning dew making diamonds in my garden, the cardinals coming to eat the sunflower seeds I put out for them, my wind chimes tinkling, good strong coffee (black, just sugar, thank you), emails from friends waiting in my inbox, the trip to the beach we are taking today, and this blog which lets me ramble on without complaining.


Remembering gratitude is changing my outlook on everything.  :)


xoxo

Sensuous

The truest definition of this word is "relating to or consisting in the gratification of the senses or the indulgence of appetite", and not the sexual connotation that society places upon it.


In my twenties, I was adamant about being respected for my MIND.  But I have come to realize upon my journey that I am an extremely sensual person and I am thankful for it.  What greater gifts are there than the pure pleasure of something that looks beautiful, smells heavenly, feels divine, tastes of bliss or sounds that can send you into pure rapture?  These are the things that remind us we are human and feed our souls at the same time.  No matter what your socioeconomic status, these things are available to you.


Imagine a world where none of the beauty surrounding us existed, sort of like living in outer space.   No flowers, no blue sky, no clouds floating by, no birds singing or children laughing, or bright sunshine on your skin, no breeze kissing you, no grass (or beach) under your feet, nothing to tempt your taste buds.


Take note of everything surrounding you, indoors and out.  Everything is a gift from the Universe, even the things that annoy you, for they remind you to be thankful of the other things.  Feeding your senses brings you closer to The Source, The Universe, Gaia, Goddess, God, whatever you want to call the force that exists around us and inside of us all.  My note from the Universe this morning said, "I's ALL God.  Everything.  Always and Forever."


Find something beautiful around you and inside you and about other people every single day.  It truly makes for such a better life.